10 Random Notes to Self

/ Sunday, July 10, 2011 /
1. Some men these days will openly admit that they would like to spend the rest of their fattening lives with you when they haven't even, for chrissakes, tried spending the entire day with you. It is not even flattering; the thought itself bothers me a lot. I am starting to conclude that they find it easy to say so because they never meant it in the first place. Makes sense. 

2. Life is good in the company of friends who listen. Keep them. Life is better when one simplifies. Simplify. Life is enjoyed best when one learns to let go of the unnecessary. Let it all go.

3. I should stretch, walk, and move more. Also, mind what I eat. 

4.Nostalgia, someone once told me, nourishes the soul. If that's the case, I just had one of those soul-feeding sessions earlier today. Out of nowhere, while writing about the 10 things you should know about personal injury cases, certain snapshots of my Siquijor trip last year came rushing in. 

It was our first morning in Larena and we went out of the inn around 5 a.m. We were dying to have coffee but the people running the place were still asleep. There were 6 of us pacing back and forth outside the inn until one of the locals who lived nearby told us that the wet market is just a walk away- about 10 minutes or so. So we decided to go. We walked, talked, and I can still recall that we were quite nervous while strolling around, given that we are in 'the Siquijor'. The road was not that deserted; there were several friendly locals who smiled at us. When we arrived at the merkado, we spotted the painitan. We ate our painit and I asked for ice cubes to add into my warm 3-in-1 coffee. I can vividly recall the weird looks given by some of the locals and my companions, too. I acted on impulse that morning; I think I had this look of  “Why are you staring at me like that? I am used to cold coffee in the morning, so what?” The ice I asked for came anyway. Not in cubes, but in shattered pieces. 

And the nostalgic snapshots ended that way. Weird. I wasn't even thinking of that Siquijor trip lately, not for the past week and certainly, not months. 

4. No matter how distorted your reality is, one has to accept that it is the Now. The Now that matters; the one happening right at that moment. The somewheres, elsewheres,and the neverwheres are just certain pieces of illusion that will not ever happen in this lifetime. Not ever. We only get to live once, we better live it with pure intent and with the people who matters the most to us.

A few things are better said, or maybe written, than done. Because the people in your who-matters-the-most list may not feel the same way towards you. It's about time that you come up with another list.

5. There's no use to waiting when there was nothing or no one to wait for in the first place. Move. If the art of waiting is necessary, go figure if it is worth the wait. If it isn't, walk away. 

6. Other people's ideas, philosophy or lifestyle may sound really good in print or online- flawless and nearly perfect. But I reckon that one should learn how to filter and sift through the whole philosophy and ideals first before embracing them as your own, too. Pick the parts that will most likely work and discard the ones that won't. Don't throw them away just yet. Keep them in a box, and go over those boxed ideals once in a while.

7.On certain days, I like to pretend that I haven't read all those books nor stalked that much by googling people's names. I want to pretend that I am as clueless as the proverbial blonde cheerleader. There is comfort in not knowing. On certain days.

8. People, by nature, contradict themselves. It's a fact and no one should act surprised about it. History can recite a long list of names of those who do so- from emperors to literary figures.

9. There is always something good in the meanest of people and something to smile about on a fucked-up day. Look around.

10. Not everyone worth saving wants to be saved.

There are things that are better done than said or written about. But at least I'm writing. On certain days like today, there is always comfort in writing. On certain days.


{ Tin } on: July 16, 2011 at 8:45 AM said...

finally, i was able to start opening the book you gave me. (tell you what, i don't open things with little doors when i feel that i cant give it real time). but the journal is now a bearer of my scattered brain. most of its initial pages had chronicled the worst days of my life. :D

but this is my real comment while/after reading this post- I like the 'there is comfort in not knowing' bit. this craving for innocence and the innocent.

{ Kai } on: July 26, 2011 at 3:35 AM said...

tin, it's good to know that the journal is serving you well. :)

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I usually say, in the end, okay, it’s love and it’s work — what else could there possibly be? -- Maira Kalman


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